I am The Spirit of Dark and Lonely Waters...

When I was a kid, in the early 70s, there were a series of Public Information Films aimed at children, mainly to do with learning to swim, staying away from railways and deep water, and not taking sweets off strange men. Some of them were genuinely disturbing, and probably wouldn't be allowed on telly these days in case they traumatised the kiddies, which perhaps wouldn't be a bad thing.

This one used to give me nightmares...



Lots of people felt the same about that one. For years it worked, and dirty, deep-looking water terrified me, and I kept away, unless there were lots of mates around to boost my confidence.

Another one I was fond of was 'Charley says...' which was a series of two or three, aimed at preventing young children being abducted, raped and butchered by sinister strangers. This was immediately in the wake of the horrific Moors Murders, where Ian Brady, aided and abetted by Myra Hindley, tortured and killed a number of small children, burying their little bodies on the moors above Saddleworth in West Yorkshire.

Charley was a stripey, animated cat, who spoke to his small boy companion in a kind of secret cat language. he was much cleverer than the boy, recognising the man in the park for the sick pervert that he was.

For a while, me and my mates used to talk to each other in Charley style. Not for long though.

This is the first in the 'Charley...' films...



I like the way "the man" walks.

Not only were we not to go off with men whose legs bend the wrong way, we were also to stay away from matches, according to our inarticulate feline guardian...



or teapots (!)...



stoves...



going away somwhere without telling your mummy...

and water, obviously, in case you meet a terrifying phantom in a monk's habit, who will make matches, hot teapots and paedophiles seem like a holiday, as your nightmares become reality...



The Charley ads, of course, formed the basis for The Prodigy's first big hit 'Charly' (note the mis-spelling), back in the late 80s. Still a stonking tune...




As for the Spirit of Dark and Lonely Waters, on YouTube, I found that someone has set it to a drum 'n' bass mix...




I'll be BACKBACKbackbackback......!

RIP Cyd Charisse

The woman with the million dollar legs died last night aged 86, in hospital, after suffering a heart attack on Monday. At the height of her fame her gorgeously long legs were allegedly insured for a million dollars (she later revealed that to be a publicity stunt by the studio).

She was born Tula Ellice Finklea in Amarillo, Texas in 1921, and began dancing with the Ballet Russe as a teenager.

She fell in love with, and married, a young French dancer, Nico Charisse, whom she met whilst on a European tour and who had been her dance teacher in Los Angeles. They married in Paris in 1939, providing Cyd with the surname which would later become so famous.

Her appearance dancing a ballet sequence in the musical 'Something to Shout About' in 1943, attracted the attention of the MGM studio. MGM gave her a seven-year contract and also (as they did in those days) changed her name, adapting her childhood nickname, Sid, to "Cyd".



Her great forte was her dancing, and her natural habitat was the lavish song and dance spectaculars of the 40s and 50s. Although I personally aren't keen on musicals, I can watch her in anything, and the dance sequences in films such as 'Silk Stockings' and 'The Bandwagon' are mesmerising, even for me. She was an undeniably beautiful woman, exuding a lithe, animal grace in her athletic dance sequences. It was often said of her that she wasn't a very good actress, something also said about Marilyn Monroe and Rita Hayworth. I could argue that point; something to do with them all being beautiful and great dancers, and the jealous sniping of lesser mortals. But I won't.

Whatever you think of her acting, you cannot fault her dancing. Just watch this scene from 'The Bandwagon', featuring Cyd and Fred Astaire.



Want more? How about this, from 'Singin' in the Rain', featuring Gene Kelly. From a gorgeous red dress, to a gorgeous green one...




In later years, after the demise of the mucical, and the hollywood bias against starring actresses over 40, her career waned. She was reduced to appearing in shit such as 'Warlords of Atlantis'.

Good bye Cyd. Your legs will still go on forever.